The Shark Film Office

The last thing that I ever expected in visiting my parents in Boise, Idaho during the first week of July this summer was sharks. Landlocked Idaho? I am sure the Syfy Channel could cook up some bull sharks invading the state's lakes and rivers, but here in the real world, I never thought that the laser shark focus that rules my life currently would follow me on my vacation. OK store, great window... But there my stepmother Jo Ann and I were, visiting a small bookstore in Meridian, when I had one of those moments that some chalk up to luck or kismet or fate or pure coincidence... and I will not rule out any of those things in this case (even if I don't believe in the first three of them). The store visit itself was pretty disappointing; the owners seemed pretty convinced they had a dandy little place, but when I asked to see their non-fiction section and it turned out to be a mere three bookcases with books piled in every direction in no discernible order at all, I knew tha...

Since there is a metric butt ton of stuff to cover right now in regards to Shark Week and SharkFest , I am going to stifle all of my normal preaching right here at the top about saving sharks and not using fear to promote these endeavors, blah blah blah... You know, the junk that I usually rant about to kick off these things. Instead, with so many episodes behind us now that Shark Week has actually concluded – and with me, despite what I stated was my intent over a week ago, getting started completely late in the game due to unforeseen personal circumstances – let's just dive right into the first night of Shark Week and let any further ranting flow naturally out of my thoughts for each special. (Not that most of the specials have set me off yet except the first one, but I always reserve the right to go nuts should an opportunity arise...) #0 – Sharktacular 2017 (premiered on July 7, 2017) Hosted by cult horror director Eli Roth, who has also held court over the nightly S...

Just for a taste of what will hopefully be coming up in the relative near future (and what was supposed to be here already) on The Shark Film Office...  This is the full length trailer for USS Indianapolis: Men of Courage : USS Indianapolis: Men of Courage is directed by Mario Van Peebles, and stars Nicolas Cage and Tom Sizemore. Yes, it is the same true story that Captain Quint spins his monologue around in one of the most memorable of many famous scenes in Jaws:  the tragic fate of the U.S.S. Indianapolis during World War II. Shortly after delivering parts of the atomic bomb that would eventually level Hiroshima, the ship was torpedoed by a Japanese submarine and sent to the bottom of the Pacific along with 300 of its crewmen. Around 900 more U.S. men were left stranded for five days in the open ocean, and among the varied reasons that another 600 or so men died before a little over 300 were ultimately rescued, the one that plays best in a widescreen movie thea...

Ozark Sharks   (2016) Dir.: Misty Talley TC4P Rating: 3/9 Species: Bull sharks. Backwoods terror is a mainstay category within the horror genre, and so I find it unsurprising that attacks of the rural variety should start occurring in the shark film subgenre as well. There have already been any number of more sea monster-oriented films taking place out in the country, and snakehead films have been popular in recent years as well. And, of course, gator and croc films have always been in abundance, and those, naturally, come with the requisite amount of stock hillbilly characters ready to whoop it up and have their shotgun-bearing arms bitten off or to suddenly get eaten after they have decided to dynamite the swamp to "git whatever 'tis out there that ate ol' Cooter las' night!" So, when I heard there was a film being premiered during this year's Sharknado Week on the Syfy Channel a couple of weeks ago called Ozark Sharks, I thought that I knew what I wa...